I should have thought of getting a pet first! Seriously though, as a wedding photographer, having a baby requires a lot of notice for starters, because of the way weddings are booked so far in advance. I have two kiddies and I constantly have a tug of war in my mind between my career and being a mother. But the most important two words to consider are "sleep" and "deprivation". If you feel you can handle it, then go for it! 1.25.11, 4:49PM
Angela : Seriously cute puppy! I have two boys, 5 & 3, and we brought home an English Mastiff puppy almost two years ago. Girl, let me tell you, these last two years with her have been harder than anything I've experienced in motherhood!!! No joke. :) If you can raise a puppy, you most certainly can raise children. Enjoy your sweet puppy. And I have no doubt you'll be a wonderful mommy when the time comes! 10.27.10, 2:28PM
you'll be great....I hear the love in your words. I think we all wonder and question ourselves...just like you're doing & always feel stronger when we make it through a tough time like you just did.....It's funny how once having kids, you just do what a momma does. Kids are more durable than you think! Hard to believe I have an 8 & 5.5 year old....whew!
What a sweet sweet photo! 8.27.10, 11:39PM
Hey Jess, I'm totally in the same boat. But so far the dog has been plenty for me. :) 8.17.10, 10:24PM
I am kinda late to the game on this post and didn't read anyone else's comments!
I can't keep a plant alive. Well, I did have a cactus for a few years, but I abandoned it until it dried up. I am ok with the dog, but he obviously loves the hubby much more than me.
Anyway, I have a 3-yo and it is just so different when it's your own kid. Their bodily functions aren't as gross. You will be able to wipe off snot with your bare hands with no cringing. It's amazing. Another positive note is that your own child's cry is much less annoying than the other babies. Seriously....other children drive me nuts. ha!
Of course, this could all change for me in a few short months since I am expecting two more girls. DRAMA!
You'll be a great mother. You are caring and you will figure it all out. Trust me! 8.16.10, 12:25AM
Jessica! I am in love with your dog. Seriously...can I dog sit for you sometime? I'll bring the treats! haha 8.9.10, 4:37PM
You'll be a wonderful Mother! And I can honestly say, there is nothing quite like it. It is amazing! 8.7.10, 4:13PM
Sarah @ BecomingSarah.com:
Personally, I think my dog is much worse than my baby. With a baby, you start small, you know? Changing diapers (which I think is dad's job for the first week or two - I mean, you push the kid out, he needs a bonding experience of his own while your crotch aches and your nipples bleed, right?) isn't that tough. For the first, like, five months, you get tons of naptime breaks and it's a slow evolution into I AM MOTHER, HEAR ME ROAR.
Then, when the kid outgrows that phase, it's awesome. You wouldn't believe how awesome it gets, honestly, it's alot of fun and you're much more prepared than you would have thought in advance because you just spent five months watching naps and waiting for something more exciting to happen.
But dogs, man, they never outgrow that pooping-is-the-most-exciting-thing-I-did-today phase.
Or at least mine didn't.
ANYWAY, long comment short, I think you'd make a great parent =) 8.6.10, 7:33PM
The great thing about parenting is that you're not all of a sudden given a 16 yr old. You start small when all they do is sleep (alot), eat and fill their diapers. So that by the time the harder stuff comes along, you're totally ready and you can read them like a book. And btw, when it's your baby - even puke isn't that disghusting.
All the cliches about parenthood - every single one is true! 8.6.10, 10:22AM
So glad she's feeling better! I know exactly how you feel, when I first got my dog I knew for sure I was a mom when I was cleaning poop off the bathroom walls and his butt! :D 8.3.10, 1:04PM
That is so cute! I have to say I have been wondering who is going to get pregnant first. You, Jasmin Star or Lauren Clark. LOL You are all starting to blog more parent type stuff! It's so cute!
In my opinion, you will have that parent instinct. You will surprise the heck out of yourself. When it is your child, it's like your souls are connected and you just know. It's an amazing thing, don't doubt yourself. 8.3.10, 11:29AM
Kelli: I'm so glad she's better! We have 2 kids and 2 dogs and I'm telling you it's worse when the dogs are sick. They don't understand, at least with kids, you can tell them 'Oh, you have the flu' and they go lay on the couch. A dog hasn't a clue and it's the saddest thing ever. 8.3.10, 10:39AM
aw! what a cute pic!!!! 8.3.10, 6:05AM
holly: ohmigoodness, when did Acey get that big?? seriously, i'm getting married in October and i'm definitely wanting kids right away... like you, so many of my friends are married and have had babies in the last two years and they all tell me the same thing: it's one of the best things you'll ever do. that you don't know love until you have a child. i can't wait!!! 8.2.10, 11:17PM
Don't believe that having dogs is totally different than kids. Sure it's a whole new level, but it certainly will help prepare you for giving up some of your freedoms. And the dog will forever be your baby, but will just take on a new dynamic once the kids come along. Everyone will have their place in the chain and none will be complete without the other...that being said, I think I'm a better dog momma than a kid momma. Dogs are just easier. :-) But I think we all know you well enough through your blog to know that you will instinctively be a great mom. Because you will HAVE to be whether you try to be or not...it just comes with mommyhood. I'm so glad your dog recovered. It is so scary when they get that sick (our Rottie got that sick when we adopted him from the pound and we freaked--that was before kids--and I even worked for vets for many years, it's just different when they're your own). :-) 8.2.10, 9:18PM
Hayley: sorry to tell you this Jessica, but having a puppy is NOTHING like having children - and they get more of a handful as they get older - if you think you are busy now - wait until you have four under 10 - it is mindboggling - you will love them until you think you are going to explode - but you will also love the times when you get some me time - which will probably be the weddings you shoot where you can actually get some intelligent conversation - well most of the time anyway - hehehehehhe - but enjoy it because it goes soooo fast!!! 8.2.10, 5:23PM
Chrystal : I became a mom less than a year ago and was in utter shock at how it changed my life. But I would trade my carefree, spontaneous days 100 million fold for the love in that baby's eyes. I would die if someone told me I had to give up the experience of being a mom. It's like seeing a new country or learning a new emotion. Undescribeable. And you will be brilliant at it. 8.2.10, 4:09PM
The real L.A. love story.:
hi jessica! i have been a long time fan and recently became a mommy! i am documenting the whole experience on a new blog since it has really been the most magical thing that has ever happened to me. for better or worse, every woman should have at least one baby once in her life. :) 8.2.10, 3:50PM
Ever since getting my two dogs, I've alternated between believing that I would be an amazing Mom, and thinking that there is no way in hell that I want to give up even MORE freedom than what I already gave up to have pets. But I wouldn't give up my dogs for the world, so I guess that says something too. But still, sometimes I long for the days when of spontaneous day trips and just going shopping for hours without having to worry about dog sitters. Ahhhh. 8.2.10, 3:29PM
so glad she is doing much better! i know how scary that feeling is! 8.2.10, 1:15PM
Glad she is doing better. It's crazy how much a little four legged furry animal can get so attached to you. I am trying to talk my husband in getting a dog. 8.2.10, 12:25PM
You know what, nobody is EVER ready to be a parent. Even the parents who try and try and finally get pregnant-still feel those feelings of fear and uncertainty before their little one arrives. What I've learned with having twins-what some people always look at in awe is that, you just figure it out! When the baby(ies) come...you just do it. And then all of a sudden they're 5 months old and you look back and think-holy crap how did we do that? I think you'll be a great mama someday! 8.2.10, 12:15PM
lrntn: very sweet of you to share. Glad all turned out well 8.2.10, 12:09PM
Uh, just read comments and had to reply to one. I always take my little babies to the movies. They usually sleep peacefully in a sling. When they wake, I nurse. No one even knows I have a baby with me. When they are big enough that that doesn't work, they are big enough to stay home without me for a couple of hours. 8.2.10, 11:56AM
Mom: You will always amaze yourself as to what you are able to to do and be so satisfied after you did it. I am very proud of you! And don't forget, if I hadn't had you, the world would not be as fortunate as it is! 8.2.10, 11:55AM
Holy cow! When did she get so big?? I think I last looked at her puppy pics and she was little. Well, as a mom of 6 with #7 on the way, I'll tell you, babies are easier than puppies. They come with you on a trip. You don't have to worry about getting a hotel that allows them or finding a border that you trust. They have diapers to catch the poop, so clean up is much easier. Puke is not nearly so gross, especially if baby is breast fed. Breast milk doesn't stink the way formula does. Also, babies aren't mobil like puppies, and you don't have to worry about them chewing up your shoes. So, if you can do puppy, you most certainly can do baby. 8.2.10, 11:51AM
What a sweet blog post! I feel you on being scared of giving up everything for children? Terrifies me!!
Ironically, while reading this one of my three (4 legged babies) started puking in the other room....geeezzzz.....this has got to be good practice? Good Luck :) 8.2.10, 11:40AM
Parenthood is not easy, but nothing this hard comes so easily because of the infinite and unconditional love one has for their children. I always say, I had NO idea what true, pure love was until I met my son. I love my husband, but my son, we'll it's just a different level of love. Not measurable in words. Yes, it's lots of responsibility but its lots of amazing moments, it's pure life! 8.2.10, 11:30AM
Don't be afraid. Change is good; your career is great, and children bring a whole new level of joy. Frankly, it is a good thing to be outside yourself in life. And ultimately, it will not seen like sacrifice. 8.2.10, 11:13AM
Ohmygosh, when did she get so big?!!
I often say raising a young pet is very much like raising a small child - just on an abbreviated schedule. (My SIL hates it when I say that, but it's true.) I hate seeing my babies sick or in pain, but knowing that I can make them feel better always makes me feel better. 8.2.10, 10:59AM
Awww, you are super sweet! You will definitely be a good mom someday :) 8.2.10, 10:49AM
The sweetest! Saw the tweets about your puppy. Glad all is better now. 8.2.10, 10:30AM
Too funny!! And cute photo of Jeff and Acey. I never could keep plants alive either, but they never told me when they were hungry or needed anything. Dogs try to and kids definitely do. We have two dogs and three kids (4 and under). Definitely not easy, but I've managed to keep everyone alive so far. :-) It's worth it, but like you said, it will totally and completely change your life - how you make decisions, what you do, where you go, even your friends. Everything. But it's worth it...most days. 8.2.10, 10:15AM
I was never going to have children because I was sure I would be horrible at it. God had other plans for me. It is the hardest, scariest and out of control thing I have ever done. I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world because they are most amazing things I have ever been a part of. I have learned I can do so much more than I ever thought I possibly could (like the puke factor!) It is a personal choice to have children, and whatever you decide it will be the right choice! The best thing I ever figured out about having babies and kids is there is no right or wrong in how you raise them as long as they are loved and cared for. Glad to hear the puppy is alright and I absolutely love that photo! 8.2.10, 10:03AM
rachel: My houseplants never survive either. I started w/a dog and then another (b/c the first one was so much work, I thought having a buddy would calm him down, and it did). Now I have 5 kids. Fortunately, your ability to keep plants alive has nothing to do with your parenting ability. A quote, don't know from whom: LOVE IS THE ONLY THING THAT MULTIPLIES WHEN IT IS DIVIDED. 8.2.10, 9:10AM
Karen (Mikols) Bonar:
Oh Jessica ... it IS a big step. I'm such a joiner in the barf department, my awesome husband cleans up all of the kitty puke around here. Keep hangin' in there! 8.2.10, 8:18AM
Dixie: What a sweet picture. My husband is like that with our 3 dogs. I think that is so attractive about a man. 8.2.10, 7:41AM
As a Mam of three, I think that makes a lot of sense. The overwhelming feeling of responsibility taking our first baby home was terrifying. I had A&E on speed dial! But you learn to trust your instincts and pretty soon you're sure you are doing it brilliantly and everyone else is doing it wrong!! (Or was that just me ...!) 8.2.10, 5:16AM
tears in my eyes. you will a WONDERFUL mother when the time is right for you.
and it's WONDERFUL reading all your blogs lately. keep them coming!! 8.2.10, 5:10AM
That's the funny thing with parenthood (whether to a dog or a child) - there is this magical thing that takes over - and you just HAVE to cope. No choice. The magical thing, is that there is always more love, more energy, more 'can-do' than we ever thought possible inside of us. Just when you think you *can't* anymore, you find that you can, and that the supply is endless. It's honestly magic. 8.2.10, 3:48AM
That's the thing about being smart...you tend to over-think the kids thing. Look at so many, uh, less than smart people cranking out tons of kids and then managing to not kill them. You will rock kids just like you are rocking puppy parenting. You owe it to the gene pool to reproduce. Looks, talent, smarts...seriously. You will rock it. 8.2.10, 12:39AM
i've seen some cute pictures but this has to be up there - i literally laughed out loud and my heart smiled a bit when i scrolled down and saw it :)
btw i totally know how you feel. when i got my pup (my first) 3 years ago he completely changed my life. when he's sick i'm like an overprotective worried mother! i can't imagine when i eventually have children...but somehow i think i'll manage.. 8.1.10, 11:57PM
kids are worth every lost trip to Vegas 8.1.10, 11:45PM
I love this post. You'll be a great mom... you have so much to give and teach! I'm with you. Thinking a lot about kids lately. So glad Acey is ok! 8.1.10, 10:41PM
This is hilarious! Seriously though, being a dog owner and a parent are very different animals, no pun intended. ;) I am a very good mommy, but all my plants are limply screaming for water and my dogs are somewhat neglected, thank the Lord they have each other: a Shitzu and a Goldendoodle. Yes, laugh, it's okay. I'm secure in our doodleness. So maybe I'm just bad at everything else?? ;) Cut yourself some slack - you will be a great mom if you choose to have a family! It is hard work, no doubt, but so rewarding all at the same time. =) 8.1.10, 8:10PM
Kim Norwood: Great insight, Jessica...loved reading your reflections. And the neat part is that when babies come, you won't be doing it alone. You will have someone who will share the joys and take his turn with the poop and puke. 8.1.10, 7:12PM
Wow I couldn't imagine going through that with my dog. I consider him my kid. I'm so glad Acey is ok. That picture is so amazingly adorable. I believe you two will make amazing parents. 8.1.10, 7:10PM
brooke @ claremont road:
I'm so glad that she is okay! I am sure you will be a fantastic mom to a real baby, too (not just your fur-baby), but I totally sympathize with the uncertainty of it all. For instance, I was at this seafood festival last night, and when standing in line for funnel cake, some middle-school kids crept their way in front of me. I nicely told them that I was in line first and they needed to go back to the line... they did, and then proceeded to yell, "But we were in front of you! We were in front of her!" ..which made me bring out the crazy eyes and turn around and yell at them for serious this time. I guess they had to learn their lesson, but I'm still kind of embarrassed about it, and it scares the crap out of me -- like, am I going to be that crazy mother who yells at her kids?? -- but then I remember that it will probably be different when they're my kids and I've had time to adjust to being in that position. Plus, my kids will know better than to get between mommy and her funnel cake. Heh. 8.1.10, 6:43PM
you can do it :) 8.1.10, 6:43PM
Jessica, I think you can be a wonderful parent! A blessing is that you'll actually want to do all those hard things that parenting brings because you love that new little person so much! 8.1.10, 6:15PM
Sometimes I think having a baby is easier than having a dog because you can bring a baby anywhere you go (except for the movies! See lots of movies now!) :)
My dad always told me that being a parent meant having a hand in creating your best friend/s and I love thinking of it like that. When the time comes, you'll be wonderful. 8.1.10, 5:44PM
Megan: what a fluffy snuggle buddy!! We arent parents (baby-wise) yet but we have a boston terrier named Rocky...he's our furry baby though! 8.1.10, 5:42PM
You know what your worrying and stressing shows? That you will be a sensational Mum, who cares and frets and dotes on her babies:) Vanessa (Mum of 5!) 8.1.10, 5:41PM
it's wise to think out big decisions, such as dogs or babies before bringing them into this world or your life. i like the raw honesty. 8.1.10, 5:32PM
I killed every plant I ever had. I even killed a cactus once. To say I was nervous about having kids was a drastic understatement. We waited 5 years to have kids. Now we have 3 boys 6 and under. Before vomit made me vomit. Pee or poo make me gag. Kids in general kinda freaked me out. Now? Bring it. Whatcha got? I can handle pretty much anything you throw at me. So, I am proof that even the most kid phobic can survive and heck, if I do say so myself, become really awesome moms. (even if they do crack their kids up by shrieking at toads in pockets) 8.1.10, 5:08PM
This is such a great post. Parenthood is REALLY hard but you manage. Just like you love Acey back to health, love will get you through the day when you have kids. 8.1.10, 4:10PM
So cute! I feel the same as you...not so sure I want or am ready for it. But maybe some day. 8.1.10, 4:03PM
Emily Heizer Photography:
Aww, that's a sweet picture. What on earth was wrong with her? Was she poisoned? That sounds extremely scary. 8.1.10, 3:46PM